sexyback

SexyBack – the first single off of Justin Timberlake’s upcoming sophomore album was just released, and it sucks major balls! Now as much as I kind of enjoyed parts of his first album, I do think that JT is a tool. I mean Cameron Diaz and her zits don’t really help the cause. I also thought that he was a total fuck when he dogged out Britty Peers and her cheetos in that Cry Me a River video.

Oh, and that whole yanking Janet’s pancake tits out at the Super Bowl thing was just not a good look – especially when neither of them would fucking own it. Also, he really needs to get over whatever sense of style he thinks he has - which I believe is best explained mathematically.

2y² (Facial Hair) ² + (x³y²Fedora) ¾ + (7x³ + Ugly Suit²) ³ + (Sneakers²) ³ = JT = Not Stylish = Quite Hideous Sense of Fashion

Now here’s the thing – I’m pretty sure that I would like Justin a whole lot more if he would do any combination of the following things…

take his shirt off more often
dump that unfortunate Cameron Diaz and her zits
rescue Britty Peers and her cheetos
fight PopoZao to the death

I've listened to the single three times today, and don't find it to be even remotely good. Who knows, maybe it's one of those songs that grows on you. Go here or here to download and listen for yourself. Or go to JT's myspace and listen. The new album, 'Future Sex / Love Sounds' is set for a September 12 release.