wimble-don't

Alright ladies, what is going on over there? Note to Sharapova – that whole cameltoe thing is simply not a good look. And Venus, put some band-aids over that shit. You look like a dude, and I’m pretty sure that no one wants to look at your man nips. I mean, isn’t Wimbledon supposed to be a pretty classy affair? Cameltoes and man nips just don’t really go with that whole tea and crumpets vibe. Talk about a Wimble-don’t!

Oh, and while we’re on topic, let’s briefly discuss the cameltoe. Here is a quick tutorial. According to Wikipedia, the following monikers may be used in its stead –

• Moose Knuckle
• Beetle hood (Brazilian term referring to VW's car hood)
• Vemaguette's hood (another kind of car hood in Brazil)
• Ninja Slipper
• Catcher's Mitt (bending over from behind)
• Clit-splitter (referring to very tight jeans)
• Muffin, referring to the shape
• Fasolo (derived from Italian slang)
• Burger, referring to a hamburger viewed from the side
• Deer Foot, popularized by Oakland rapper Keak da Sneak
• Veggie, or Vaginal Wedgie (pulled up knickers)
• Beaver Cleaver (Canadian origin)
• Thunderpaw, referring to a very large camel toe
• Vertical Smile
• El Gato (Colombia)

Ok - now that we've explored all of that, and now that I've grossed even myself out, please excuse me while I go wash my eyes out with soap.