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Saturday, July 01, 2006

wimble-don't

Alright ladies, what is going on over there? Note to Sharapova – that whole cameltoe thing is simply not a good look. And Venus, put some band-aids over that shit. You look like a dude, and I’m pretty sure that no one wants to look at your man nips. I mean, isn’t Wimbledon supposed to be a pretty classy affair? Cameltoes and man nips just don’t really go with that whole tea and crumpets vibe. Talk about a Wimble-don’t!

Oh, and while we’re on topic, let’s briefly discuss the cameltoe. Here is a quick tutorial. According to Wikipedia, the following monikers may be used in its stead –

  • Moose Knuckle
  • Beetle hood (Brazilian term referring to VW's car hood)
  • Vemaguette's hood (another kind of car hood in Brazil)
  • Ninja Slipper
  • Catcher's Mitt (bending over from behind)
  • Clit-splitter (referring to very tight jeans)
  • Muffin, referring to the shape
  • Fasolo (derived from Italian slang)
  • Burger, referring to a hamburger viewed from the side
  • Deer Foot, popularized by Oakland rapper Keak da Sneak
  • Veggie, or Vaginal Wedgie (pulled up knickers)
  • Beaver Cleaver (Canadian origin)
  • Thunderpaw, referring to a very large camel toe
  • Vertical Smile
  • El Gato (Colombia)

Ok - now that we've explored all of that, and now that I've grossed even myself out, please excuse me while I go wash my eyes out with soap.

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