roger federer + oversized birkin = hotness

I’m not sure if anyone else is following The French Open – or if anyone follows tennis in general, but it’s been an interesting tournament so far.

Venus Williams was the only American, male or female that was still standing, and she was just ousted by some 17 year old Czech (Nicole Vaidisova) – the same girl who upset the number 1 seed, Amelie Mauresmo in the previous round. The two girls from Belgium, Justine Henin-Hardenne (the defending champion) and Kim Clijsters both sailed through to the semis pretty easily today. I prefer Henin-Hardenne, but I’m having an I heart Clijsters moment because she just beat perpetual über-cunt Martinia Hingis (who, despite her attempt at a comeback, can forever choke on a big one)!

The big story of the tournament seems to be Rafael Nadal, who by the way is really hot… but only from the neck down. He just broke the record for consecutive wins on clay – he has 57 and the record was 53. Yawn. Whatever, I’m sure my bomb Federer will eventually get the best of him. Here’s the thing about Roger Federer – I was lucky enough to get to see him in action last year, and his tennis is unbelievable - but he’s just not cute. I just can’t subscribe to the floppy pony hair and sweat bands.

Remember the days when tennis players (cough… Pete Sampras) were both terrific and nice to look at? Sampras is easily my all-time favorite player. He looked great. He played great. He had a great rivalry going (with Andre Agassi), and he went out on top with his amazing win at the 2002 US Open.

So getting back to Roger Federer – his game is phenomenal. And while Sampras may have him in the looks department, I think Federer plays better tennis. He also carries an oversized Hermès Birkin, which completely ups his hotness.

As a bit of an aside, did you know that you can buy a fucking Birkin bag on amazon.com? Can you just imagine how that conversation would go? Well here, I'll show you...

"Oh, I love your bag - wherever did you find it?" Answer - Amazon.com

Yeah, I'm going to have to go ahead and give that a B-L-O-W-N!