baby suri

Well, it seems that Zartoo Third Overlord of Blargon 7 and his child bride have finally revealed their baby. The article and photo spread appear in the October issue of Vanity Fair, which that mousy cunt, Katie Couric previewed last night on the CBS Evening News. The magazine hit newsstands this morning.

In a private conversation with Vanity Fair features editor Jane Sarkin, Katie Holmes tells her that "it's been heartbreaking" to see what's being said in the press about her family and her baby. "Some of the crap that's out there—the stuff that's said about my parents and my siblings [tabloid accounts implied that Katie's family did not hit it off with Tom]—it's really frustrating the amount of shit that's out there. And the stuff they say about Suri?! You shouldn't say that about us, and you can't say that about my child."

Holmes explains that the gossip "eats away at me because it's just not O.K.," but that she keeps up on it because "this is my future. This is my family, and I care so much about them. To see how someone as caring and good as Tom is—to see how things can just get so twisted and turned around. I mean, where does it come from?"

Sarkin reports that Cruise and Holmes coo over the baby like any new parents. "She has Kate's lips and eyes," Tom says of the baby. "I think she looks like Kate." Holmes counters, "I think she has Tom's eyes. I think she looks like Tom."

So here's the thing - cute baby, but why is it wearing a toupee? Zartoo thinks that the baby looks like his child bride, and the child bride thinks that the baby looks like Zartoo. Whatever, that's a rent-a-baby if I've ever seen one. I heard that they keep the real one chained to a wall in the cellar... and that it glows in the dark!